The Garlic Matrix

Garlic is good. Roasted garlic that you spread on Challah is very good. But garlic can stand as an obstacle toward any Friday evening conjugal activity.

Garlic lovers need to understand the Garlic Matrix.


NG= No Garlic
VSG= Her Some Garlic
VAG= Her Lot of Garlic
VEG= Her An Entire Garlic
RSG= Him Some Garlic
RAG= Him Lot of Garlic
REG= Him An Entire Garlic
B - Chances of both partners being interested is quite high
RH - Chances he is interested is hi
RM - Chances she is interested in medium
RL - Chances she is interested in low
VH - Chances she is interested in high
VM - Chances she is interested in medium
VL - Chances she is interested in low

so a code of RHVL means he is interested and she is not interested at all

Her garlic consumption in this matrix goes across the the top. His garlic consumption goes down the side.

XX NG VSG VAG VEG

NG B RHVM RHVM RHVL

RSG RHVM RHVM RHVL RHVL

RAG RHVL RHVL RHVL RHVL

REG RHVL RHVL RHVL RHVL


What the chart clearly demonstrates is that if the male eats more than just a small amount of garlic, he may as well sleep on the couch, go out to a sholom zachor, or find some alternative friday night activity.

The chart also clearly indicates that regardless of how much garlic the female consumes, the male will still be willing to engage in a night activity, despite the females waning interest due to her own garlic consumption.